Another revived blog - let's do this.

I know, everybody starts a blog with great intentions. I had 'em. Blogged, took pics, wrote words. Tagged.

Then when you fall off the wagon (sugar - get in my face) life isn't really very blogworthy sometimes. But here you are, faithful little blog - still waiting for me to get my shit together again.

This time I knew I'd need help. Topping out the dress sizes at 22 (I can't even write that without wincing - but owning it anyhow) and having zero energy has just made me decide enough's enough. But I knew I couldn't quit fructose without a team, and finally, at 41 years old, I'm ready to rely on someone else for help. Not my strong suit, asking for help.

So I've signed on for the I Quit Sugar 8 week program. Started today, I'm heading out to do the grocery shopping soon. The fridge and pantry are completely fructose free. The freezer has been emptied of all it's little hidden bits of added sugar, and the last Movenpick Chocolate icecream binge was had over two weeks ago.

Welcome back, dear readers, let's do this.

Chocolate Junkie Bowl

Craaaaaaaazy chocolate cravings tonight.

Apparently, chocolate addiction is a thing. I have it, I'm sure. I've finally narrowed down the moments when the cravings hit. When I'm super tired and stressed (Smallest Offspring refuses to sleep properly for two days); and after the Offspring are all in bed, with the cuppa Mr makes me each evening as we blob on the couch.

I've never smoked, nor been addicted to alcohol or drugs, so I don't have much to go on here by way of comparison, but I'm pretty sure the perpetually running script in my mind could be substituted for what it must be like to try to come off these other addictive substances:  'eat chocolate now, go on, just a little bit, go out and buy some, the service station is open late, you deserve it, just one bit won't hurt, you won't have to eat it again tomorrow, just once today, you could have some and no one will know..... ' and so it goes on.

Having 'given up' sugar, somehow chocolate (delicious, creamy amazing New Zealand Whittakers Chocolate) is really putting up a fight.

It wasn't until about 10pm when I realised I might be able to assuage the cravings in a sugar free (and late-night-outing-avoiding) kind of way.

Chocolate Junkie Bowl

3 large dollops of Greek Yoghurt (probably about 1 cup, if we're measuring)
1 tablespoon raw organic cacao powder
1 tablespoon raw organic cacao nibs
1/2 banana, choppped.

Mixed that lot up, demolished it in short order. Cravings gone.

Now, if we can just work out how to get the Smallest Offspring to fall asleep before midnight...

Thursday Breakfast Snapshot

Breakfast snapshot

Coco-nutty Granola Clusters with Greek Yoghurt and Banana.

Quick and easy to prepare, but took me nearly an hour to eat it in between dealing with the offspring and their morning of crazy. 

I'm pretty sure sugar free purists have a whole not eating bananas thing, but I needed a bit more ooomph this morning after a big day and night of breastfeeding, and I really didn't have the time and mental space to scramble eggs this morning. Although, as I sit now and write this instead, maybe I should be eating eggs instead of telling you about NOT eating eggs?

Midnight Pumpkin Mud

My new favourite breakfast also doubles as a handy late night snack. Yummy 'Snickery Pumpkin Mud Smoothie' from Sarah Wilson's 'I Quit Sugar'.

It's now just after 11.40 pm. The smallest offspring (SO) has been cluster feeding on and off since around 8pm. She's taken to a new habit of being relatively settled during the day, then partying late into the night - much like her parents' hazily distant youth. But after a couple of nights of this, combined with some busy days, my energy levels (and sense of humour) are depleting as midnight approaches.

Of course it's also super hot and humid, so no one is having any fun, and usually my go-to energy boost right about now would be chocolate - and lots of it. But I've discovered on my sugar free recovery that I can't really stop at a couple of bits of chocolate just yet, so it's off the menu for now.

Ransacking the fridge uncovered the leftover cup from yesterday's breakfast, so in between 'shushing' and rocking the SO, I've scoffed it. For me Pumpkin Mud covers all the bases for chocolate, cold, pudding, protein and veges.  The middle offspring loves this too, and shares a small cup with me in the morning.

Snickery Pumpkin Mud Smoothie (makes two serves)

Blend the following, add a small handful of ice to blender if you like it runnier or need it colder.

*    small handful of spinach leaves
*   1 1/2 tablespoons raw cacao powder (I use LifeFoods brand)
*    1/2 cup Greek yoghurt (or almond/coconut/any milk you like)
*   1 tablespoon vanilla protein powder
*   1 tablespoon peanut butter
*   3 wedges cold roasted pumpkin (organised types will have premashed and frozen this in portions)

It blends up to be a seriously unappetising colour, but that just means that no one round here wants to steal it. Apart from my middle offspring food adventurer, she's discovered it's yummier than it looks.

Kitchen Time

Although this is 'the first post', I'm saving all that 'first post' blah blah for later. When I can write for a while knowing the smallest offspring is down for a proper nap, not her current sort, which is 'might be asleep, might not be'.

Yesterday was the first day of doing some industrial level (for me) sugar free cooking.  I've got myself a copy of 'I Quit Sugar: For Life' by Sarah Wilson, and read it in one hit cover to cover a couple of weeks ago, to help me revitalise my sugar free life, which has fallen by the wayside since the smallest offspring's birth at the end of November.  Inside the book I fell in love with SO many of the recipes, tips and ideas that I knew I'd done the right thing blowing the Christmas gift budget on myself.

Yesterday's makings included:

Homemade Cream Cheese

Had to sacrifice one of the Seahorse's muslin wraps for this, but SO worth it to see the creamy cheese forming. I'm sure you could use any old cloth really - even a clean tea towel would work. This is basically just labneh - same exact technique. I'm looking forward to experimenting with flavours - adding spices and herbs to jazz it up. But for now it's waiting in the fridge, along with the lovely whey that was strained off.

Berry Banana Ice Blocks

I modified these from the original which uses Mango - even though mango is one of my top five favourite fruits - as we had frozen berries and bananas already. Added the rice malt syrup as it's the first time making them, so I wasn't sure on the sweetness for the troops who are still keen on sugary treats. Be warned: you have GOT to love coconut cream if you make these! Additional note for any food styling types - plastic bear-face tops on ice blocks is very 'now'. Just saying.

Chocolate Co-Co Nutty Granola Clusters

Somehow I decided not (completely forgot) to roughly chop the nuts before toasting them in the oven, but nothing that can't be fixed by a large knife when I head back to the kitchen. I'm looking forward to eating this with thick Greek yoghurt, or grabbing handfuls when I get the chocolate munchies.

If anyone knows where to get 85% Cocoa chocolate in New Zealand can you let me know? I'd love to try some of the choc recipes in the book, but really, it's a bit like cheating if I use regular chocolate.